I have told a deer tail or two, in my time. As I mentioned before, they run a bit rampant in Wonderful City. I have told of a time where I got 7 calls for an injured deer while at the same time one block away I only got one call of a man down on a busy street corner. I recently told the tail of the woman cavorting in the middle of the night with a deer that was, well, cavorting in the middle of the night. But this tail, takes the cake.
A deer was run over, or heck perhaps it died of natural causes, but it ended up at the 2600 block of the major avenue. This all started at 0715hrs. It started slowly at first.
"Hi I'd like to report a dead deer at the 2600 block of Main Ave."
"OK, no problem, I'll call the Humane Society and they will pick it up."
Soon after, "Hello, you need to send someone out fast, there is a dead deer out here and it is right in front of the middle school. The children are going to see it!"
"OK, no problem, the Humane Society has been called."
"Tell them it's an emergency!"
Now in the beginning, I asked, why? Why is it an emergency? By the 10th call, I just said OK.
Our Chief was out patrolling, (Totally cool, right? He was doing traffic stops and everything.)
Then he called in a dead deer. Et tu?
Next I got a hysterical caller that wanted us to change the position of the deer because, "It's legs are sticking straight up and that is just upsetting!" Great, I can only imagine the calls we'd get for re-positioning a dead deer....
Later still, (the Humane Society was very busy and this was considered low priority), a woman called because, "There are men in a white van moving a dead deer! They're MOVING IT!!!" "Yes, ma'am they notified me they just trying to help by moving it out of the flow of traffic." "Can they do that??????" She cried, clearly very upset. "Um, sure, if they want to." I answered. I am still not sure why that was so upsetting to her.
About a dozen more dead deer calls later, (that seemed to be increasing in urgency), an Officer came up on the air with a "Callout for Department of Public Works." Before I even thought about it, I said, "Go, ahead.....Unless you are reporting a dead deer...." The officer called me up a moment later laughing and said, he was going to put a sign on top of the deer that said, "I AM OK, I HAVE GONE TO A BETTER PLACE" The Humane Society must have finally came and picked up the deer shortly after that, because at 2:45 in the afternoon, the dead deer calls finally stopped. Whew, just in time. I can only imagine the frenzied callers, if it had still been out there when school got out! Venison, anyone?
A deer was run over, or heck perhaps it died of natural causes, but it ended up at the 2600 block of the major avenue. This all started at 0715hrs. It started slowly at first.
"Hi I'd like to report a dead deer at the 2600 block of Main Ave."
"OK, no problem, I'll call the Humane Society and they will pick it up."
Soon after, "Hello, you need to send someone out fast, there is a dead deer out here and it is right in front of the middle school. The children are going to see it!"
"OK, no problem, the Humane Society has been called."
"Tell them it's an emergency!"
Now in the beginning, I asked, why? Why is it an emergency? By the 10th call, I just said OK.
Our Chief was out patrolling, (Totally cool, right? He was doing traffic stops and everything.)
Then he called in a dead deer. Et tu?
Next I got a hysterical caller that wanted us to change the position of the deer because, "It's legs are sticking straight up and that is just upsetting!" Great, I can only imagine the calls we'd get for re-positioning a dead deer....
Later still, (the Humane Society was very busy and this was considered low priority), a woman called because, "There are men in a white van moving a dead deer! They're MOVING IT!!!" "Yes, ma'am they notified me they just trying to help by moving it out of the flow of traffic." "Can they do that??????" She cried, clearly very upset. "Um, sure, if they want to." I answered. I am still not sure why that was so upsetting to her.
About a dozen more dead deer calls later, (that seemed to be increasing in urgency), an Officer came up on the air with a "Callout for Department of Public Works." Before I even thought about it, I said, "Go, ahead.....Unless you are reporting a dead deer...." The officer called me up a moment later laughing and said, he was going to put a sign on top of the deer that said, "I AM OK, I HAVE GONE TO A BETTER PLACE" The Humane Society must have finally came and picked up the deer shortly after that, because at 2:45 in the afternoon, the dead deer calls finally stopped. Whew, just in time. I can only imagine the frenzied callers, if it had still been out there when school got out! Venison, anyone?
6 comments:
A little over a year ago I hit a deer with my cab. I was making a left turn, doing less than 10mph. Caused about $1,000 damage to the cab and broke both of the 6-point stags rear legs. It wasn't killed. It drug itself across my lanes over the center divider and into the two opposite lanes and eventually into the wooded area adjacent. Tied up traffic for about 20 minutes.
During that time every mom with an SUV full of kids yelled at me. The "Bambi Syndrome".
Animal Control doesn't respond to wild animal calls. Thats the domain of the DLNR (Department of Land and Natural Resources) and the PD aren't allowed to put the deer down. So it slowly died during the night.
We used to call out the county jail and they would respond and add venison to the CJ's diet. Guess that isn't done anymore.
It used to sicken me that more attention is paid to these animals than people. This happens in our County all of the time.
I just laugh now, because are just stupid. JOB SECURITY!
lol too funny!
At least its a deer. We dispatch for a very small city also that we call farmville. "I want to report a pig walking on the street" I want to report a dead cat X 10!" "I want to report my cow dead" WTF? What are you doing!?
I about spit soda on my screen laughing when I saw the picture of the deer at the table. We get quite a few animal calls for officers to respond to because animal control has gone home.
One officer has become the magnet for these type calls due to something strange always happening when he handles it. This same officer called for animal control to respond to his house for a bat that he OC'ed and poked with his ASP because it wouldn't leave. After dispatch and officers ridiculed him the bat "flew away". After that he was "Batman" bat logos taped to his car doors at night.
Oh my gosh, I was trying not to laugh too loud because I'm reading this post at work, but this is great and "regular" people would not believe the deer calls we get. LOVE IT
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